If every time you had a negative feeling and it cost you money.

How much are you willing to buy Anger? That’s right Bob. Money.

To feel entitled to be angry.. you had to pay, like you had to pay for coffee.

You know that moment. When you are in a conversation and you can feel the anger for not being heard, appreciated or looked down upon. (or that is YOUR view of it)… That you feel the anger starting at the pit of your stomach and it is bubling up and you don’t know why.. you just feel it. STOP.

Ok.. Now.. that you feel that feeling.. you can stop the conversation and tell them you need a minute to process this.

Absorb all that they are telling you. They are trying to get through what you think.. and talk about what you know. They are trying to teach you to value yourself.. It is either with the advice they are trying to help you with or they are telling you.. you need to walk away from the situation it brings and let it go.

Amazing.. even if you are in the conversation and even if you choose not to tell the ” I need a minute to process this because what you have said is important and for me to understand what you are trying to say so that I understand it correctly”. This is a way to honor them and yourself. To ackowlege the value of what they have to say and know to then magnitize it to you and what you need to learn and then KNOW. Know that anything they say to you is what they know and how you allow it to affect you is what you need to choose to know.

Ok. So this is where it gets more tricky. If you had a situation that makes you feel raw in the nerve.. and you can feel it building.. what can you notice about the situation you are in AND now that you recognize the feeling.. AND you are now going to choose to feel a certain feeling… What are you willing to pay for that feeling.

So Mr Bob Barker says to you:

If you had a budget and you could spend each minute in 24 hours on feelings what would YOU BUY?

YOU HAVE $1,000.00 A DAY to spend of feelings… How would you spend it?

Anger -  5 Minutes.. $130

If you want the list of value of feelings.. check this out…

Colored Feelings Menu Prices

Happiness is FREE.. Be in the black.


Have you ever looked up into the sky?

And saw the stars they way they look in photographs?

Where everything is expansive pin holes and ruffles of things in this black velvet fabric.

.. and think that so many before you sat under these same stories around a fire and share their history or others history,

These stories make your life, in how you relate them to others, how you think the world is supposed to be  and what you ask for.

As I was sitting around this fire and looking up into the sky and seeing the stars for it feels like the first time. To feel the connection to each person around the campfire and listen to their stories of who they feel in this world and how their families affect them to how the world is “supposed” to be… to realizing that being centered means being in the middle of the story and not being on  your side or their side.. but being in the middle of the scale. Weighing in but not judging,

It doesn’t matter to the center of the scale of which side is heavier and balances out and brings down the one side… it just sits in the middle and lets what ever side do what it does. It just is the result of what is on the side.

Then as I am listening to these wonderful people talk about their experience in this life and what they observe about how they feel.. I look up into this deep velvet sky, my head tilted so far back with this bowl of trees.. around me.. to feel the need to breathe…. and being between each view of the story and just listen.

Hearing the stereo of what each person was saying it. Translating their words into colors and visioning the wavelengths of what they said. It gives a non judgement of now and the then. Being the center of the weight on both sides and feeling the color of the wavelengths of those words as sounds that travel to me and then to the stars.

We are so fortunate that when you are ready to change.. the story you tell yourself is up to you.

I invite you to change… I don’t think you “should” change… it is up to you to look for reasons for it to be FUN to change.

The invitation is open to how you interpret it. We just have to choose.


Here is the excerpt to Carl Sagan from the website ISR.IST

Look again at that dot. That’s here. That’s home. That’s us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every “superstar,” every “supreme leader,” every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there–on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam.

The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors so that, in glory and triumph, they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot. Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds.

Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position in the Universe, are challenged by this point of pale light. Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity, in all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves.

The Earth is the only world known so far to harbor life. There is nowhere else, at least in the near future, to which our species could migrate. Visit, yes. Settle, not yet. Like it or not, for the moment the Earth is where we make our stand.

It has been said that astronomy is a humbling and character-building experience. There is perhaps no better demonstration of the folly of human conceits than this distant image of our tiny world. To me, it underscores our responsibility to deal more kindly with one another, and to preserve and cherish the pale blue dot, the only home we’ve ever known.

–Carl Sagan, Pale Blue Dot, 1994


Today was a rather interesting day!

The thought about where.

Where are your feelings today?

Are you stuck?

Have you given a thought about being.

Being a human who is in being. Be here and at “this” moment.

It is “that” moment that you use to stop growing. That longing for.. “do you remember when…”

When you get stuck in trying to be the person you used to be..

It is the transition to realizing who you are and what you choose to do.. is how to be.

If “this” is the moment that you are supposed to be in (the “don’t live in the past or live in the future, it is the now” It is the moment you are stuck in.. not in the making of a decision… but of being in the moment but today’s moment.. but of another.. where you were happy, you were excited, felt good, felt in sync, been in the right place and time… but the key is to also recognize that this moment is where you are supposed to be.

IT is just the same. The moment now and the moment it was then. It is just the moment. But when you are stuck.. you wonder how long you can go on like this.

That is when, this is when.. right now you say no more.. today AND tomorrow that yesterday will no longer hold you here. Because here and right now is where you want to be.. because really that is the only choice you make.


I got so mad!

I went mad!

How the hell did I get from here?

I was having coffee, chatting, enjoying my day, having fun, planning my business and loving the sunshine..


I am sad my mom dies, confused and overwhelmed about my business and ANGRY. SO ANGRY I am shaking!

I took my anger out on someone I love. I yelled. I YELLED at someone that tells me they love me everyday (but… I must say it first).

Angry that my mom dies, someone (bank employee)… phone bullying me into doing their bidding like I am their bitch.. That if I don’t do something THEIR way.. it inconveniences them. Their solutions cause me more problems, a tax on my time. I have to jump through THEIR hoops their way.. or ELSE.  but meanwhile I am trying to be gentle with someone who tells me of the violence they experienced and their own death escape, another whose loss I can’t imagine of their home, family and financial,  job loss and personal well being. A friend who is supporting and being supportive during a community tragedy and a personal effection. This ripple from whoever, to them, to me and now ended with the person that I love. I didn’t let it stop with me… Shame on me. This is mine to not control. but flow.

I had to STOP my anger while I was on the phone with “the bank” to not pass it back. WHOOOOOAAAAA…. Volcanic internal eruptions so LOUD AND HOT that I would have BURST. … and boy did I.. the anger was sooooo RED.. it reverberated to the cosmos AND beyond!. After the phone call..

BIG MASSIVE circle of anger. (Not recommended to with heart conditions of love or children)… Acting like an angry adult.. because even a child wouldn’t have this magnitude.. I mean star quality. Massive explosion..like a death star (a space from inside so capable of destroying a person with one shot of its superlaser of sharp words and expansive effect.)

Sometimes it is too much. This life thing

The ripple effect is being passed down and through you, from everyone else that is also experiencing the same thing.. all of those ripples double and effect each other.

“It is your choice”.. haa haa.. I got cut off. Disconnection. If you are going to acknowledge the ripples and let them go through you  then you must acknowledge them and let them flow.. that it is just swimming…. or you can either fight them.. and feel them all.

Karen Walters says. “Give it up. let it stop. apologize and move on.”  She lets them flow and not affect her. Everyone is feeling the same shift. The shift of that: what we don’t know, the tilt of the angle. Trying to find our footing. Being happy for the moment. Being excited about life.. but from everything we have been told is truth so far. It is different. We don’t know, the world HAS changed and is changing. Everything that we know is in flux and … the pace of the pain from the growth. our wee little spirits can’t keep up… unless.. you stop.

In the dip.. of being the choice of direction. That whole fork in the road thing. That moment when you decide to change directions.. and everything that you know.. to change and be different. It is being stuck at that cross roads. what direction do I take…

Shit I look at my watch. I have been here for HOW LONG? like 5 years? and I hadn’t picked yet.

And to make the leap onto the path.. which one. Once choice left.. Be nice and leave the fork and move on. Just because the sign said “stop”

OK Go! – This Too Shall Pass

Wow. Time to get a Move on.

I am sorry. Colin.